Top Ten Tips for Teaching Table Manners to Children
Provided by Fabkins Guest Writer, Lisa Gaché of Beverly Hills Manners™

IIt is never too early, nor too late to begin instilling the value and importance of learning proper table manners. In addition to the warmth and comfort it provides for the family, it allows an opportunity for us to feed our bodies with a well-balanced meal, to share in the ritual of conversation, and to slow down from the days’ activities to enjoy time together. These ten tips will help you teach your children appropriate table manners so you too can enjoy your family dining experiences.

1. Use your napkin. The napkin is a versatile tool at mealtime. It can be used to wipe food from your mouth, to catch crumbs or to use as a barrier if you happen to sneeze or cough while at the table. Before beginning your meal, the napkin should be lifted with the left hand to open and placed into your lap. If you need to excuse yourself during the meal, place your napkin on the back or arm of your chair, when you return place it back in your lap. To signal the end of the meal, pinch the center of the napkin and place it on the left side of your place setting.

2. Help set the table and clear dishes. To learn how to properly set a table, you simply need to practice, with the help of an adult or parent the first few times. At the end of the meal, always offer to help clear the dishes. Remove all plates and glassware from the right. Never stack plates, carry only two plates at a time.

3. Chew with your mouth closed and keep elbows off the table! No one likes to witness a fellow diner talk with a mouth full of food. Use your body language to communicate until you have had a chance to completely swallow the contents in your mouth. Also be sure to keep your elbows off the table while eating, however your forearms are allowed on the table in between courses or when resting after you have completed your meal.

4. Use your utensils, not your fingers. Different cultures have different standards for table manners. In some countries it is perfectly acceptable to eat with your fingers, however in America we are taught to eat our food with utensils or silverware. Taking pride in good table manners is learning the proper way to use these dining implements, the American way.

5. Practice the secret language of waiters. When out for a meal, to signal the “resting position” (taking a break from your meal), use your fork and knife to make an inverted “V” on your plate. To signal the “finished position” (done with your meal), close your fork and knife together at an angle on your plate. This lets your server know that you have completed your meal and that it is okay to take your plate.

6. Ask to leave the table. Ask permission before leaving the table whether you need to use the restroom during your meal or would like to be excused at the end of the meal. One common way of asking is “May I please be excused?” In the case of leaving the table temporarily, place your napkin on the left hand side of your place setting, rise from the table and push in your chair. If you’re finished with your meal, offer to take your dishe to the kitchen.

7. Break bread. Tear off only a bite size piece of bread. Use your butter knife to spread a small amount of butter onto the piece that you wish to eat. Repeat same with each new piece of bread.

8. Make pleasant table conversation. When you sit down with your family for mealtime, however often that may happen, take turns sharing one good thing that happened during the day and try to ask questions to the other people at the table.

9. Learn how to eat like the French. There are two styles of eating, the Continental style and the American style. Most Europeans practice the Continental style of eating their food by holding their fork in the left hand and the knife in the right. The fork tines are face down and used to gently stab the food while the knife acts as the pusher. The pattern is to cut and then eat, cut and eat. It is much more efficient way of dining and presents a more polished appearance, so give it a try.

10. Compliment the chef! It is always appreciated when someone takes the time to prepare a meal. Whether your parents ordered in or spent hours cooking the meal, the preparation and display of the food on the table is worth the recognition, so take a moment to acknowledge them and say “thank you.” If you are presented with items on your plate that you do not care for, do not complain.

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